By FRANK REMKIEWICZ
Columnist
One in five. Does this mean anything to you, my readers? It does to me, and that is the reason for this particular column. This is slightly off the spiritual basics I usually write about, but the phrase “one in five” is a fundamental issue of love that we should all be aware of. It should also be one of the subjects of your continuing prayers.
The little finger on my right hand now has nail polish on it. I never thought I would see the day this would happen. I resisted all my daughter’s calls to have her paint my nails as part of a homegrown conspiracy. It took my granddaughter and one very good reason to allow her to paint one of my fingernails.
The story behind the painted fingernail begins with my granddaughter, Kiera. I’m sitting out on our patio enjoying one rare, beautiful day—blue sky, fresh air, and a hint of a breeze. Kiera comes out to the backyard with a request to paint my nails. I thought to myself, whoa! I then said out loud, “Kiera, you know your papa would not let your mother paint his nails when she was your age.” I went on, “Sweetheart, your Papa is a Marine, and the last thing most Marines would do would be to paint their fingernails!” Unphased, Kiera pressed on. She assured me it wouldn’t hurt; it was just one fingernail, and I could choose any color I wanted. So I asked, “But why would I do such an unusual thing to my fingernail?” This is the story she told me.
There is a guy in Australia by the name of Elliott Costello. He traveled to Cambodia as part of an outreach program, entitled Hagar International, to help improve a severely impoverished area. There, he met a five-year-old waif named Thea. As he worked in the village, Thea worked with him, and they drew close enough to have a conversation. Thea asked to paint his nails. Finally, after a bit of discussion, he agreed to have one nail painted. What changed his mind was the heart of the discussion. Thea quietly told Elliot how she had been sexually abused - at the age of 5! As Thea painted his first fingernail, he told her that he would always keep that finger painted to remember her and the pain she suffered.
As Elliot returned home to Australia, he realized that he wanted to make a change among men for the sake of children’s safety from sexual abusers. His concept morphed into the Polished Man Project. Elliot reviewed all the available data and decided that all men should paint one in five fingernails. The one in five represents that one out of every five children will suffer sexual abuse in their lifetime.
After Kiera shared this story with me, I readily agreed to paint one fingernail. I chose my little finger to remind me that these are children who are abused and in pain. I chose black nail polish to remind me that there is no more heinous a crime than child abuse. Lord, forgive me, but I believe that there is a special place in hell for child abusers.
I traveled via my search engine to the Polished Man website to check out the formal presentation of this rather innovative way of addressing child sexual abuse. The website is https://polishedman.com/about and contains valuable information about the program’s origins and expansion. I also visited the Charity Navigator website to review their financials. For me, there are a few issues yet to be resolved before I formally begin recommending or working for them or with them. The organizational structure is missing, along with the finances. I will look for who is on the executive board and what their compensation is. Who are the primary officers, and what are their compensation levels? Where do the funds raised go? Since I do not have complete answers to all my questions, I cannot “jump in” with both feet until those fundamental questions are answered.
What I will do in the meantime is continue to keep one fingernail polished in black fingernail polish. We all need to be aware that violence against any person, but especially against women and children, is never acceptable under any circumstances. At this point, I encourage any man who wants to call attention to stopping the violence against women and children to find a color and pick a fingernail and paint away! And I hope to see you around town.
Frank Remkiewicz is an area resident and contributes a monthly column focused primarily on faith and religion. He can be reached at fremkiewicz@gmail.com. Opinions expressed are those of the author.
